Catch You Later Alligator – Best Animal Jokes
(Photo by Tim Clayton/Corbis via Getty Images)
Everybody knows the old joke about the chicken that crossed the road. However, there are many other good (or should we say – better) animal jokes, like the one about the guy and the chimp. You know the one we’re talking about, don’t you? So go on and read it, what are you waiting for?
But first thing first – the chicken:
- Why did the chicken cross the road?
- To get to the other side.
- A policeman stops a man in a car with a chimp in the front seat. “What are you doing with that chimp?” He asks, “You should take it to the zoo.” The following week, the same policeman sees the same man with the same chimp again in the front seat, with both of them wearing sunglasses. The policeman pulls him over. “I thought I told you to take that chimp to the zoo!” The man replied, “I did. We had a great time. Today we are going to the movies!”
- Psychiatrist: What seems to be the problem?
- Patient: I think I’m a chicken.
- Psychiatrist: How long as this been going on?
- Patient: Ever since I came out of my shell.
- Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek?
- Because he was always spotted.
- A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals rocked the game and everything looked lost for the small team. But during the second half, a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, “Where were you during the first half?” He replied “Putting on my shoes!”
- Why did the kangaroo stop drinking coffee?
- She got too jumpy!
- What do you call a cow in an earthquake?
- A milkshake!
Next – it’s time we draw an obvious line